My parents were (and still are) opposed to software updates. When I was younger, I could not understand why. I viewed software updates as something good, a necessity, practically an obligation. The recent trends in the software world showed me the wisdom of those older than me.

Apple recently introduced a design “language” called Liquid Glass, or as the opinionated parts of the internet call it, “Liquid Ass”. This is a redesign of the software interface on your apple laptops, computers and apple’s mobile phones. I watched yourube videos of the update and decided that it was not for me. At this age, I want my computer to be an appliance. Your phone, technologically indistinguishable from a general purpose computer, by the way, should also be an appliance. A device that does its job, and does that job well. The ability of an appliance to do its job should not change seemingly at random, based on the machinations of some software engineer.

Each time I use my phone, I do not want to be wowed by the design skill of Apple’s designers in Cupertino. I want the damn thing to be comprehensible and usable. Now, I happen to own several Apple devices and I accidentally updated my tablet computer to iOS 26, the version that introduces Liquid Glass. I now detest the thing and the operating system.

Yes, apps on my iPad now have a menu bar that I can browse, subtle reflections and refractions, and many other changes. See, this is what bothers me. I do not want to re-learn how to use a computer. I want the computer’s operating system to get out of my way. You can read more about the confusing menu icons here, but the part that annoys me are the changes. Why are designers obsessed with this “Scandinavian” minimalism and these bloody flat icons? Why the bloody hell are the menu icons all the same colour? Why are they so tiny? Is apple’s design team a colony of ants?

Microsoft’s windows is exactly the same. My work computer was forced to update to Windows 11 and the start button moved to the middle of the taskbar. Why? The start icon now depicts these four blue squares. What on earth does that mean? It is supposed to depict the panes of a window, but without any hints of reflections or a border, it is just four squares. Flat design, my flat ass.

This “flat” design trend is bonkers. A computer used to be relatively intuitive to use. Shadows told you which parts of the screen were above others. Colours in menu bars told you which window was selected and which were not. Yes, the metaphors of files and folders is not perfect, I myself have never used a filing cabinet but I understand the metaphor well enough. This idea of change for the sake of change is frustrating and I now, finally, see why my parents refuse to update software.

You never know when some poorly informed product manager will force an update on you without the option to restore the familiar. This is such a problem that I now refuse to update the software on my phone and on my laptop. I will run my existing versions of the operating systems until I no longer can. If something works, just leave it be.

I hate this.

(Maybe don’t think out of the box sometimes?)